How do I tell my mom Im dependant on her chastising me, and i really can’t find the words for this, but I dread the thought of myself ever failing to obey her or agree with her and I fear even thinking differently to her?

Communicating feelings like these can be challenging, but it's important to express your thoughts honestly. Here are some steps you can consider to help convey your feelings to your mom:

**Reflect on Your Feelings**: Take some time to think about why you feel dependent on her chastising. Is it fear of disappointing her, a desire for validation, or something else? Understanding your feelings can help you articulate them better.

**Choose the Right Time**: Find a quiet moment when both you and your mom are not busy or stressed. A calm environment can facilitate a more open conversation.

**Be Honest and Vulnerable**: Start the conversation by expressing your feelings honestly. You could say something like, "Mom, there's something I've been struggling with that I’d like to share."

**Use “I” Statements**: This can help avoid sounding accusatory. For example, “I feel anxious about voicing my own thoughts because I’m afraid of disappointing you.”

**Acknowledge Her Influence**: You might say, “I value your opinions and guidance, but sometimes I feel like I rely too much on your approval.”

**Express Your Needs**: Let her know what you need from her moving forward. You might ask her to encourage you to express your own thoughts or validate your feelings, even if they differ from hers.

**Be Open to Dialogue**: Encourage her to share her perspective as well. This could lead to a deeper understanding on both sides.

**Consider Professional Help**: If you feel comfortable, suggest the idea of family counseling or therapy, where a professional can help guide the conversation.

Remember, it can take time for both you and your mom to understand and adjust. Be patient with yourself and her as you navigate this conversation.