Hi Im missy a single mom, I need a behavioral contract with my 15 year old daughter Lisa and Kyle her mentor i hired that is fantastic at helping defiant teenagers. So far my daughters behavior has gotten so much better since he started mentoring and dis

I understand that you are looking for a behavioral contract for your daughter, Lisa, and her mentor, Kyle, that outlines expectations and consequences related to her behavior. However, it's important to approach discipline in a manner that is constructive and appropriate for her age. In Tennessee, corporal punishment in the context of discipline by a non-parent, such as a mentor, especially involving physical punishment like spanking, may not be advisable. Here are some key points related to discipline and the law in Tennessee: 1. **Parental Authority**: Parents can discipline their children, but certain forms of physical punishment must be reasonable and not excessive. 2. **Age Considerations**: At 15 years old, many experts recommend using non-physical forms of discipline that encourage responsibility and understanding rather than physical punishment. 3. **Legal Implications**: If a non-parent (like a mentor) engages in physical forms of discipline, it could potentially be construed as abuse or lead to legal consequences. It’s crucial to ensure that any disciplinary methods comply with state laws and prioritize the well-being and rights of the child. 4. **Child Protection Laws**: Tennessee has laws regarding child abuse and neglect, and any disciplinary method should ensure the safety and dignity of the child. ### Suggested Behavioral Contract Framework You might consider developing a behavioral contract that emphasizes positive reinforcement and clear expectations rather than physical punishment. Here’s a sample outline of what you might include in the contract: --- ### Behavioral Contract **Participants**: Lisa [Last Name] (Daughter), Kyle [Last Name] (Mentor), Missy [Last Name] (Parent) **Duration**: [Specify duration, e.g., six months] #### Goals - Improve Lisa's behavior and decision-making skills. - Foster open communication and trust. #### Expectations 1. **Respectful Communication**: Lisa agrees to communicate respectfully and refrain from talking back. 2. **Curfew**: Lisa agrees to adhere to her curfew of [insert time]. 3. **School Attendance**: Lisa agrees to attend school regularly and communicate any issues to her mother or mentor. 4. **Substance Use**: Lisa agrees to refrain from smoking and using substances. #### Consequences for Not Meeting Expectations 1. **Loss of Privileges**: For each infraction (e.g., late for curfew), Lisa may lose privileges such as screen time, outings with friends, etc. 2. **Reflection Time**: If rules are broken, Lisa will have a set period for reflection (e.g., journaling or discussions with her mother or mentor). #### Support and Positive Reinforcement - For every week that Lisa meets expectations, she earns a reward (e.g., extra time with friends, a small gift). - Regular check-ins will be scheduled to discuss progress and feelings about the agreement. **Signatures**: - _____________________________ (Lisa) - _____________________________ (Kyle) - _____________________________ (Missy) **Date**: ____________ --- ### Conclusion I recommend exploring alternative methods of discipline that align with positive parenting techniques. Programs that focus on communication, responsibility, and respectful relationships may be more effective than physical forms of discipline. If you feel uncertain about the best way to proceed, consider consulting with a family therapist or counselor who can provide guidance that respects both your and Lisa's needs while adhering to legal guidelines.